In the Quiet Places
Matthew 6:1-8
1 “Beware of practicing your righteousness before men to be noticed by them; otherwise you have no reward with your father who is in heaven.
2 “So when you give to the poor, do not sound a trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, so that they may be honored by en. Truly I say to you, they have their reward in full. 3 “But when you give to the poor do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, 4 so that your giving will be in secret; and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you. 5 “When you pray, you are not to be like the hypocrites; for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and on the street corners so that they may be seen by men. Truly I say to you, they have their reward in full. 6 “But you, when you pray, go into your inner room, close your door and pray to your Father who is in secret, and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you. 7 “And when you are praying, do not use meaningless repetition as the Gentiles do, for they suppose that they will be heard for their many words. 8 “So do not be like them; for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.
Kathy Griffin is being censored for comments she made that were found offensive. She is quoted as saying “A lot of people come up here and thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus."
She went on to make some other comments but I found this one particularly interesting. Our culture is saturated with Christianity. There are those who would go so far as to say that America is a “God’s country”. I don’t follow this line of reasoning. Generally because I believe that God is far bigger than national boundaries. Also, considering the fact that I frequently leave and many times don’t wish to be a part of this country, I find it hard to believe that an omniscient God would not rather choose the coast of Italy as a suitable place to call home.
I mean, seriously.
As I read her words, I was reminded of the scripture mentioned above. “When you pray, go into your inner room, close your door and pray to your Father.” Last weekend I attended church with my aunt. I had promised her that I would attend a service with her at her church before I left. Last weekend was my last in Livingston, so it fell upon that Sunday to the great delight of my Aunt. As I sat in her small evangelical Christian church, I began to wonder why it was that I had waited so long to come here. The people weren’t too bad and the preacher was actually quite nice. Then, 10 minutes into the opening prayer, it hit me (no, not the floor because I feel asleep after ten minutes of praying): I like God in the quiet places. There’s something about these loud hot-air preachers that are going to storm the gates of hell if you will repeat Jesus’ name ten times with them that really get under my skin. When I imagine prayer, I am in a room alone, with the door closed, quiet before the almighty. What is the purpose of prayer? Do we believe that the “prayer of a righteous man availeth much (James 5:16)”? If we do not pray for something, will it not happen? Or is prayer a mode of communication between our soul and its creator? If this is true, should we pray in public? Would you put your phone on speaker when you are talking to the one you love?
So, back to the beginning. I would like to think that if I won an Oscar, or some other note-worthy award, I wouldn’t say a thing. I would stand up there tell everyone that really it was the director that made me look so good and then whisper a quiet thank you to the lord above.
Showing posts with label You oughta know. Show all posts
Showing posts with label You oughta know. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 11
Wednesday, August 29
An Honest Book
I want to apologize to the Blog community for letting things get a little personal on here. I should have considered the consequences of participating in a 'Blog fight'. As I sat at dinner with my friend last night and related the story to her, I realized how ridiculous this all is. Writing a long diatribe to accuse me of wrongdoings is ridiculous and responding to it with folksy wisdom is even more foolish...
Hopefully I can stand in front of my friends as I am, without worrying about the misconceptions that come from the written word. It’s hard to remember that these Blogs are more than spoken words said in the heat of the moment; they are testaments to our feelings and thoughts that are open for everyone to analyze. Maintaining your dignity in the online community is just as important as and sometimes harder than in the real world. In our face-to-face conversations and interactions we are granted a certain level of leniency. I feel this is missing here.
So, again, I apologize.
Editor’s note: I used the title Self-Defense because of the experience I have had in the courtroom. Many people waive their right to an attorney when they believe they have nothing to hide- this is how I feel. I am and always have been an open book, maybe a little hard to read at times, but honest none the less.
I want to apologize to the Blog community for letting things get a little personal on here. I should have considered the consequences of participating in a 'Blog fight'. As I sat at dinner with my friend last night and related the story to her, I realized how ridiculous this all is. Writing a long diatribe to accuse me of wrongdoings is ridiculous and responding to it with folksy wisdom is even more foolish...
Hopefully I can stand in front of my friends as I am, without worrying about the misconceptions that come from the written word. It’s hard to remember that these Blogs are more than spoken words said in the heat of the moment; they are testaments to our feelings and thoughts that are open for everyone to analyze. Maintaining your dignity in the online community is just as important as and sometimes harder than in the real world. In our face-to-face conversations and interactions we are granted a certain level of leniency. I feel this is missing here.
So, again, I apologize.
Editor’s note: I used the title Self-Defense because of the experience I have had in the courtroom. Many people waive their right to an attorney when they believe they have nothing to hide- this is how I feel. I am and always have been an open book, maybe a little hard to read at times, but honest none the less.
Tuesday, August 28
Put Your Link into It
"All the while, the middle class sits around debating Gay Marriage, or whatever else is popular like it is going to affect the fate of the universe, completely forgetting that the have to scratch and claw for every single thing they have as the rich just breeze through life. The rich may have worked hard to get rich, but that does not allow them to force the bulk of America's taxes on the rest of us"
http://musingsfromatree.blogspot.com
"All the while, the middle class sits around debating Gay Marriage, or whatever else is popular like it is going to affect the fate of the universe, completely forgetting that the have to scratch and claw for every single thing they have as the rich just breeze through life. The rich may have worked hard to get rich, but that does not allow them to force the bulk of America's taxes on the rest of us"
http://musingsfromatree.blogspot.com
Monday, August 27
Self- Defense
When I was living in Lancaster, I dated a young British man named Richard (yeah I’m going to talk about an ex). After a couple of weeks he decided that he didn’t want to date me anymore. I listened to him calmly as we sat together on my dorm room bed. I cannot remember his argument exactly but it centered somewhere around the fact that I was leaving to go back home in a couple of months. After he had stated his case, I told him that I thought he was right and that we should break-up. He sat there confused. He had expected a protest, I assume, and my acquiescence had startled him into thinking that I didn’t really want to date him at all. You see- as I calmly stated to him- that was not the case. I believe that if there is a point where you think that you should break up with, or no longer date, a person and if you believe in this reason strongly enough to tell them about it, then you should, most definitely, end the relationship. Because, if there can be a doubt in your mind strong enough to start the dialogue of a breakup then it will assuredly lead to one whether immediately or many years down the road. My statements had the strange effect of changing his mind and making him realize that he didn’t want to break up with me at all.
Three weeks later we broke up.
The point is this- sometimes we don’t take our own advice. There have been many times when I have decided that I shouldn’t be dating someone for a particular reason but I continue because they (or me) talked me back into it.
Reasons don’t just go away.
They also don’t just appear and acting like they did is only lying to yourself.
*As I slept on my brother’s couch Saturday night, I thought of this story. Birthdays usually don’t have a mental effect, but, somehow, at 22 I can say, ‘things are changing’.
Sometimes I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear
And I can’t help but ask myself how much I'll let the fear take the wheel and steer
It's driven me before, it seems to have a vague, haunting mass appeal
Lately, I'm beginning to find that I should be the one behind the wheel
Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there with open arms and open eyes…
It's driven me before, it seems to be the way that everyone else get around
Lately, I'm beginning to find that when I drive myself, my light is found
When I was living in Lancaster, I dated a young British man named Richard (yeah I’m going to talk about an ex). After a couple of weeks he decided that he didn’t want to date me anymore. I listened to him calmly as we sat together on my dorm room bed. I cannot remember his argument exactly but it centered somewhere around the fact that I was leaving to go back home in a couple of months. After he had stated his case, I told him that I thought he was right and that we should break-up. He sat there confused. He had expected a protest, I assume, and my acquiescence had startled him into thinking that I didn’t really want to date him at all. You see- as I calmly stated to him- that was not the case. I believe that if there is a point where you think that you should break up with, or no longer date, a person and if you believe in this reason strongly enough to tell them about it, then you should, most definitely, end the relationship. Because, if there can be a doubt in your mind strong enough to start the dialogue of a breakup then it will assuredly lead to one whether immediately or many years down the road. My statements had the strange effect of changing his mind and making him realize that he didn’t want to break up with me at all.
Three weeks later we broke up.
The point is this- sometimes we don’t take our own advice. There have been many times when I have decided that I shouldn’t be dating someone for a particular reason but I continue because they (or me) talked me back into it.
Reasons don’t just go away.
They also don’t just appear and acting like they did is only lying to yourself.
*As I slept on my brother’s couch Saturday night, I thought of this story. Birthdays usually don’t have a mental effect, but, somehow, at 22 I can say, ‘things are changing’.
Sometimes I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear
And I can’t help but ask myself how much I'll let the fear take the wheel and steer
It's driven me before, it seems to have a vague, haunting mass appeal
Lately, I'm beginning to find that I should be the one behind the wheel
Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there with open arms and open eyes…
It's driven me before, it seems to be the way that everyone else get around
Lately, I'm beginning to find that when I drive myself, my light is found
Friday, August 17
Abortion, Welfare, Genocide, and everywhere in between
“These people walk by a widow deformed by leprosy begging for a few paise, walk by children dressed in rags living in the street, and they think, "Business as usual." But if they perceive a slight against God, it is a different story. Their faces go red, their chests heave mightily, they sputter angry words. The degree of their indignation is astonishing. Their resolve is frightening.” --- Life of Pi
There has been a shift in our country. The people have moved away from the leaders and whether it is from distrust or displeasure, the evidence of this shift is blatant as we watch the circus that has become the Presidential Election. The contenders are numerous and have begun their fights earlier than many have ever seen. We are already looking to the future with such unabashed joy that people have chosen their favorites for president a full year before the election. All this is to say that there is a shift. The world has become smaller through technology and information has been made readily available to the public like never before. Our generation is educated on the world but with knowledge comes responsibility. This past weekend, I was with my mother and grandmother. I asked my grandmother if Americans knew about the Concentration Camps in WWII. She said they had heard rumors but no one knew the extent until the American soldiers opened the gates of the camps and saw for themselves the horrors of the Nazi regime. Fast forward to present day, me sitting on the couch and watching CNN. There is a genocide going on in Darfur and we are doing nothing about it. America- the land of the free and the defender of democracy- doesn’t give a crap that thousands of Africans are dying by the hands of their own government. Oh wait, actually we do give a crap. You see, good ol’ George has called this government out in meetings – while they sit in the back and laugh at his condemnations- but the problem is this: They have information on terrorists and somewhere along the line information about terrorists is more important than preventing genocide.
But that’s not where my rant ends- If you were worried that I would leave out the good faithful people of the Church, rest assured I have condemnation for them too. Where is the church on this? Why aren’t we doing something about it or at least praying about it? When I feel frustrated and lash out at the newspapers- something that happened yesterday morning- my aunt calmly says the only thing we can do is pray about it. Even more, the only thing we can hope for is a Christian President because he will know the right thing to do. Bullshit. A smart president will know the right thing to do. A president with good advisors will know the right thing to do. A president that cares more about the people than oil would know the right thing to do. Christians believe their purpose is to save souls, but what souls are there to save if people die? This reminds me of a dichotomy I should not bring up:
Abortion and Welfare.
Say it together.
Christian right- very much against abortion and welfare. Now, why, might you ask, would they want to save the babies of woman who can’t afford to have the babies in the first place? We shouldn’t give out free birth control because that contributes to promiscuity and we shouldn’t have abortion because they shouldn’t have gotten pregnant in the first place and we shouldn’t support welfare because people shouldn’t be having kids they can’t afford….
I just gave myself a headache.
So, I can already see the comments on this one. I know I shouldn’t be looking at people; they aren’t perfect only Christ is, but when did that become a scapegoat to personal responsibility. When did the fact that a reincarnated divine being living a mystic existence in your soul allow you to be exempt from caring about people, or, even better, pretending to care. This is why my mother is one of the few devout I can bare to stand. She does care and she goes multiple times a year to places across the world or to her next door neighbor and proves that she cares.
All this to say that I think we need to act more. I don’t know how to begin but I think that if the Church wanted to do something to change the world they could begin by spending less time on evangelizing and spend more money on the needy.
There. Done.
“These people walk by a widow deformed by leprosy begging for a few paise, walk by children dressed in rags living in the street, and they think, "Business as usual." But if they perceive a slight against God, it is a different story. Their faces go red, their chests heave mightily, they sputter angry words. The degree of their indignation is astonishing. Their resolve is frightening.” --- Life of Pi
There has been a shift in our country. The people have moved away from the leaders and whether it is from distrust or displeasure, the evidence of this shift is blatant as we watch the circus that has become the Presidential Election. The contenders are numerous and have begun their fights earlier than many have ever seen. We are already looking to the future with such unabashed joy that people have chosen their favorites for president a full year before the election. All this is to say that there is a shift. The world has become smaller through technology and information has been made readily available to the public like never before. Our generation is educated on the world but with knowledge comes responsibility. This past weekend, I was with my mother and grandmother. I asked my grandmother if Americans knew about the Concentration Camps in WWII. She said they had heard rumors but no one knew the extent until the American soldiers opened the gates of the camps and saw for themselves the horrors of the Nazi regime. Fast forward to present day, me sitting on the couch and watching CNN. There is a genocide going on in Darfur and we are doing nothing about it. America- the land of the free and the defender of democracy- doesn’t give a crap that thousands of Africans are dying by the hands of their own government. Oh wait, actually we do give a crap. You see, good ol’ George has called this government out in meetings – while they sit in the back and laugh at his condemnations- but the problem is this: They have information on terrorists and somewhere along the line information about terrorists is more important than preventing genocide.
But that’s not where my rant ends- If you were worried that I would leave out the good faithful people of the Church, rest assured I have condemnation for them too. Where is the church on this? Why aren’t we doing something about it or at least praying about it? When I feel frustrated and lash out at the newspapers- something that happened yesterday morning- my aunt calmly says the only thing we can do is pray about it. Even more, the only thing we can hope for is a Christian President because he will know the right thing to do. Bullshit. A smart president will know the right thing to do. A president with good advisors will know the right thing to do. A president that cares more about the people than oil would know the right thing to do. Christians believe their purpose is to save souls, but what souls are there to save if people die? This reminds me of a dichotomy I should not bring up:
Abortion and Welfare.
Say it together.
Christian right- very much against abortion and welfare. Now, why, might you ask, would they want to save the babies of woman who can’t afford to have the babies in the first place? We shouldn’t give out free birth control because that contributes to promiscuity and we shouldn’t have abortion because they shouldn’t have gotten pregnant in the first place and we shouldn’t support welfare because people shouldn’t be having kids they can’t afford….
I just gave myself a headache.
So, I can already see the comments on this one. I know I shouldn’t be looking at people; they aren’t perfect only Christ is, but when did that become a scapegoat to personal responsibility. When did the fact that a reincarnated divine being living a mystic existence in your soul allow you to be exempt from caring about people, or, even better, pretending to care. This is why my mother is one of the few devout I can bare to stand. She does care and she goes multiple times a year to places across the world or to her next door neighbor and proves that she cares.
All this to say that I think we need to act more. I don’t know how to begin but I think that if the Church wanted to do something to change the world they could begin by spending less time on evangelizing and spend more money on the needy.
There. Done.
Tuesday, August 14
In regards to France:
I feel as though I’m running full speed towards the edge, waiting for the moment when I sprout wings.
In regards to Home:
Like an outfit that doesn’t quite fit and isn’t your color, I feel out of place and, at times, blaringly so.
In regards to Love:
I don’t want another goodbye. I don’t know how to be genuine without being cliché and I don’t know how to hope without being naïve.
In regards to Family:
God, I miss them already. England showed me what I’ve got and now I’m realizing what exactly it is that I am leaving behind.
In regards to Friends:
I couldn’t be happier. I am closer to more people than I have been in my entire life and I love it.
In regards to Life:
My friend Keil said it best this weekend: “Things are amazing right now. In fact, they are so amazing it is making me nervous. I have never felt so good and I can’t help but wait to be brought back down to reality.”
I don’t have time to wait for the other shoe to drop. I am jumping in to the life I’ve been waiting for 21 years to live. I am happy and I am content, but most importantly- I have peace. I feel as though I'm traveling down the road of life; I don't have all the directions but I know I'm traveling in the right direction.
I feel as though I’m running full speed towards the edge, waiting for the moment when I sprout wings.
In regards to Home:
Like an outfit that doesn’t quite fit and isn’t your color, I feel out of place and, at times, blaringly so.
In regards to Love:
I don’t want another goodbye. I don’t know how to be genuine without being cliché and I don’t know how to hope without being naïve.
In regards to Family:
God, I miss them already. England showed me what I’ve got and now I’m realizing what exactly it is that I am leaving behind.
In regards to Friends:
I couldn’t be happier. I am closer to more people than I have been in my entire life and I love it.
In regards to Life:
My friend Keil said it best this weekend: “Things are amazing right now. In fact, they are so amazing it is making me nervous. I have never felt so good and I can’t help but wait to be brought back down to reality.”
I don’t have time to wait for the other shoe to drop. I am jumping in to the life I’ve been waiting for 21 years to live. I am happy and I am content, but most importantly- I have peace. I feel as though I'm traveling down the road of life; I don't have all the directions but I know I'm traveling in the right direction.
Saturday, August 11
Thursday, August 9
So.......
I'm working on a new chapter but I've committed to writing on this blog at least every other day- which I haven't decided is good or bad for my writing- but, either way, I'm going to write something now, because, well, it's that time again kidos.
*that has to be one of the longest sentences ever recorded by man....in fact, I'm sure it is.
Stuff I've been thinking about lately ( because I'm sure you want to know )
1. Whether I should stay in Europe forever or come back and go to Law School. Though, Pat thinks I should stay in europe, and since I sometimes confuse his with the voice of God, I'm leaning that way.
2. I've been working out ALOT lately...that and studying my LSAT material. In fact, it reminds me of the days when I focused on school and health because I was ambitious and driven; instead of now when I just live in a REALLY boring town.
3. I Feel Fine by the Riddlin Kids has been on repeat in my car. I'm not sure why exactly but I think it has something to do with a previous conversatin where I said "I'm fine being single" and he responded "No, you're not."
Who says that?!?!
4. I took pictures of my car to put up on the internet and since have been looking at them whilst at work. I think, "Damn that's a nice car". But that is how much I love Europe, I'm willing to sell it...Maybe God will see my anguish and give me both?!?! Please Pretty Please.
5. If you're still reading this you eithr think I'm EXTREMELY neurotic or that it is really really boring to work at a law office. It's usually the former but today a bit of the latter.
I'm working on a new chapter but I've committed to writing on this blog at least every other day- which I haven't decided is good or bad for my writing- but, either way, I'm going to write something now, because, well, it's that time again kidos.
*that has to be one of the longest sentences ever recorded by man....in fact, I'm sure it is.
Stuff I've been thinking about lately ( because I'm sure you want to know )
1. Whether I should stay in Europe forever or come back and go to Law School. Though, Pat thinks I should stay in europe, and since I sometimes confuse his with the voice of God, I'm leaning that way.
2. I've been working out ALOT lately...that and studying my LSAT material. In fact, it reminds me of the days when I focused on school and health because I was ambitious and driven; instead of now when I just live in a REALLY boring town.
3. I Feel Fine by the Riddlin Kids has been on repeat in my car. I'm not sure why exactly but I think it has something to do with a previous conversatin where I said "I'm fine being single" and he responded "No, you're not."
Who says that?!?!
4. I took pictures of my car to put up on the internet and since have been looking at them whilst at work. I think, "Damn that's a nice car". But that is how much I love Europe, I'm willing to sell it...Maybe God will see my anguish and give me both?!?! Please Pretty Please.
5. If you're still reading this you eithr think I'm EXTREMELY neurotic or that it is really really boring to work at a law office. It's usually the former but today a bit of the latter.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
